Category: IVF

Hysteroscopy, results, struggle & strength

Once again catching up 🙂

About a month after my HSG, was my (dreaded) Hysteroscopy and Essure placement.

I made the tough decision to go ahead with the Essure procedure and block my tubes completely. Now, the only way I would ever become pregnant is through IVF. It was a very hard decision but after realizing that the chances of: #1 Never becoming pregnant,#2 Having an ectopic pregnancy or #3 Having toxic fluid possibly kill my embryo(s)….I said…let’s do this and be safe!

The night before I had to take this medicine to “help open up my cervix”. Seemed harmless, right? Umm….wow…no, some of the worst cramps…..all night long…I mean, I could handle it.. ..I’m tough(just keep telling myself that and it works right 😉 ).I was also pretty nervous about this WHOOOOOOLE thing. If I REALLY thought about it….I’m choosing to fully block my ONLY tube and never be able to become pregnant naturally….ever. I had to keep telling myself though….that I’ve NEVER even been pregnant so maybe this is the only way I will ever become pregnant? ALL those questions and answers processing through my brian. No wonder I couldn’t sleep! I prayed and felt that, I had to take this next step. And this will take me one step closer to becoming a Mom…..all I’ve ever wanted….

Surgery Day….i couldn’t eat or drink anything past midnight the night before. Surgery was scheduled for 11:30am…I woke up…I was SO thirsty! My hubby drove me to the office. I got settled in. They put me under general anesthesia and I was out….

3 hours later…..

I woke up to a sweet faced nurse asking me questions about my first job. I work in television so I get questions all of the time…but I was so confused…and exhausted and still THIRSTY! 3 Hours?! I thought this was going to take 1 hour?? What happened??

My RE came in and said…”We ended up having to do a D & C on you(what???), you had A LOT of scar tissue…looks like you have Asherman’s Syndrome too but we placed the Essure and hopefully it will stay there”.  “Oh, and you have a drain and a balloon inside of you for the next week…we will check on that in a week”.

What?!?!!!

Wow…gotta love how the Dr.’s just tell it like it is…soooo…one more thing to add to my growing list:

  • I only have one “lazy” ovary/one fallopian tube
  • My only fallopian tube is blocked and has hydrosalpinx
  • I have a lot of scar tissue in my uterus and diagnosed with Asherman’s Syndrome
  • I have this (gross) drain tube and balloon in side of my uterus for the next week..feels great…oh joy
  • Small uterus (yah…he told me that too)
  • Low AMH(.62) and High FSH (12.8)

So, after all of that, I still have hope. I won’t give up. I’m seeing this journey more as a job. I will take whatever steps to get to where I want to be.

My RE is concerned about my eggs and quality/quantity so he wants to get them out asap. I will be doing a retrieval cycle in November. Then take a month off. Do another retrieval in Jan. Take a month off. And then hopefully do an FET in March. I’m almost overwhelmed by all of this. Emotionally…let alone financially. But I will do it…whatever it takes….

Thank you friends, I’ll need your support and encouragement. I enjoy reading your updates and am thrilled when I see that one of you is pregnant. I also feel the pain of losses with you and disappointment. This blogging community is strong, I am so happy to have you all. I might be at a low point now but one day I will be at my highest point…share the journey.

Through this beautiful struggle…I will stay strong…

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Essure….are you sure?!

August 2013 ( a little behind on my updates..trying to fill you all in) 😉

I know the title and picture are confusing…wait, permanent birth control?? I thought this girl wants to get pregnant?!

I was VERY confused too….let me explain…..

After I got the results of my HSG….I was devastated 🙁 My one and only tube was blocked….and to top it off I also have something called Hydrosalpinx I apparently have the hydrosalpinx from my ruptured appendix(at age 10) 🙁

Great…great…great…

So I only have one ovary….one tube…and that tube is blocked AND has this Hydrosal-crap!? Wow…weee….

My RE looks pretty deflated too…he proceeds to tell me that we have to take care of the hydrosalpinx before we even think about (my now only option of) IVF….what?!

You see….this fluid and damage to the tube could prevent pregnancy all together or if pregnancy was to occur the fluid could kill the embryo or an ectopic pregnancy could be the result.

He then proceeds to tell me about Essure. Yes, the same Essure that women who are OVERLY FERTILE use to PREVENT pregnancy forever…their “family is complete”…..ummm…yah…excuse me Doc…what was that?! I WANT to get pregnant…like more than anything in this world….and you want me to have surgery to permanently make me infertile?? Well, after reading up about it…apparently it is a fairly new procedure to help with hydrosalpinx. Before this option, they would just tie your tubes and then hope to have a successful IVF cycle. Another issue, with Essure….you get the procedure done through a hysteroscopy and then have to wait 3 months to see if it worked?!! 3 more months before even thinking about IVF…oh how my patience is being tested..

Now, decision time….what do I do??

After reading a great deal about it…I figure…I better cover ALL of my bases before we shell out the thousands of dollars for IVF. The thousands of dollars I’ve been saving since I was 21 to put towards a house (yes, I was one of the few financially smart 21 year olds in the world) now going towards starting our own family….

So, let’s do it…..next up Hysteroscopy/Essure (OMG…sooo scared!)…here we come…

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