Category: HSG

0.6%-0.8%…That’s me…

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Seems unbelievable right? To be included in SUCH a small percentage of what “could” (or could not) happen?

“Approximately 0.6%–0.8% of patients cannot reach the minimum endometrial thickness for pregnancy”

0.6%-0.8%….seriously?

I went in today for a “natural” cycle lining check….let’s be REAL nothing is “natural” anymore. I’m literally a human test dummy…and the verdict….2.8mm…..:( As most of you know…it should be more like 8.0mm+ I am dumbfounded and so are my RE’s…..

I had my 2nd hysteroscopy on April 10. I went to THE premiere Asherman’s Syndrome Dr….he did the hysteroscopy and said…he only saw some “filmy adhesions”…not that bad and a “small” bald spot in the upper area of my uterus. He didn’t seem too concerned. He put me on Pentoxifylline(Trental) and Vitamin E(I actually started it at the end of March when I first saw him)…and we wait a couple of months….

I know it’s only been a little over a month….but most people have their thickest linings right AFTER a hysteroscopy….and mine is basically non existent…

Now…I also….re-read my last paragraph…and I did write “most people”….obviously, i am NOT most people….I am, unfortunately, part of the 0.6%-0.8% of women who cannot seem to reach the minimum endometrial thickness for implantation…..wow….those odds…..not even 1%

This all just happened about an hour ago. I was optimistic….feeling great…feeling like…”my lining should be nice and plump” The surgery had to work!

Then the ultrasound…and nada….I still have a super thin lining AND fluid in my lining πŸ™ What’s the deal?

0.6%-0.8%….it just gets me…..gets to my soul…..why me? How is it possible to be a part of this percentage?

What gets me most is how easy the Dr.’s are to start talking about gestational carriers. Like it’s like…ordering a pizza…what?? Sure, because everyone just has $100,000 laying around….

But, I am EXTREMELY fortunate and after my 2nd IVF, I have 6 blastocysts…very fortunate and blessed…but I’ve never even had an embryo near my uterus….ever. I’ve never been pregnant….never had a miscarriage…never a D&C until last Aug. I only have one tube…that’s blocked and now…that’s REALLY blocked because I had the Essure device placed to prevent a possible Ectopic pregnancy or fluid pouring back in killing an embryo.

I’m still determined to, at least, have one embryo placed in my uterus before looking into a gestational carrier(if that’s even financially possible??)…can’t even think about that now…even though tears still seem to force their way out of my eyes…like I have no control over them…I am strong…but gosh…I am less than 1% πŸ™

I’m researching like it’s my job…and it WILL be my job…because I have no choice…

I’m looking at all of the options…there HAS to be an option for us 0.6%-0.8%….and I’ll find it..

I’m going to try another lining stimulation cycle next month…with estrogen injectables…with 2 IVF’s down…injectables are nothing to me…so let’s do it…we might also try something called G-CSFΒ It’s new and the results are mixed but I’m literally willing to try anything….

I’ve also looked into stem cells….

In 2009…a women in India had impossible problems with her lining and using her own bone marrow stem cells…they implanted them into her uterus and she was able to grow an adequate endometrium….I really hope I don’t have to go that route (God are you listening πŸ˜‰ but don’t put it past me…

I’m on a mission….I have tears streaming down my face…but they are fighting tears….I wipe them away as I search and search for what is right for me….and what is right for me is not giving up and finding everything and anything i can about growing my lining…

0.6%-0.8%…..I have 99.4% against me…..but there’s still a chance….and as long as there’s a chance…I haven’t lost…..

And I don’t like losing…..

 

Hysteroscopy #2- The Waiting Game

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So after IVF #1, IVF #2 and 1 cancelled FET, it was time to go back in my uterus to see exactly what is going on and why my lining was not growing….

Instead of having my RE do another hysteroscopy (he did the first one in August 2013), I decided to do my research and find one of the best surgeons for Asherman’s Sydrome in the world. I am so very blessed that he happens to be in the same city I live in. Also, I emailed him my history and, not kidding, 5 minutes after I sent my email I got a phone call….from the Dr HIMSELF!!! I was shocked to say the least…in a good way. To have one of the most reputable Dr.’s in the world care enough to call me and talk about my issues…free of charge….was priceless. He didn’t even push or mention coming to see him…he spent over 30 min on the phone with me, just to help…needless to say, I did set an appt…he won me over and I believe he was sent to me…and this is the next step towards my dream of becoming a mother true πŸ™‚

On Thursday, April 10, I went into surgery. This would be the 4th time going under in 7 months…my body is hating me. Getting put under general anesthesia is tough on me for some reason…but I will survive. And I did. It’s never pleasant. Also, for the second time, I had a stent inside of my uterus. It’s placed there to hold my uterine lining “in place” I guess you can say?? The Dr. went in and saw some more scar tissue. He surgically removed it (did NOT do a D & C to remove the scar tissue) Apparently, when you do a D&C to remove scar tissue, you are actually causing more damage πŸ™ I didn’t know that the first time…so please…if you have scar tissue they need to use scissors to “break it up” and then place a Cook Stent in to assume the normal structure of your uterus. I’m sure it’s a LOT more technical….but that’s what I’ve learned and I want you all to learn from my mistakes..

The stent was taken out yesterday during our follow-up visit. And, I suggest taking some sort of pain medicine….because I didn’t and it was…really, really painful. I don’t like to complain. And I am SUPER tough with pain…but this was bad. It has something to do with the way the Cook Stent is formed(like a triangle). But I survived…just take something first πŸ™‚ He went over some pictures. Showed me where the scar tissue was and talked about some “bald spots” within my uterus. It sure doesn’t sound good and it’s not ;( So I am taking 4 mg of Estradiol everyday for 21 days, 800mg Trental a day, 1000mg Vitamin E everyday and I’ll take progesterone days 17-21.

Also, because I don’t have enough things going on….he couldn’t find the Essure coil that was placed inside my only fallopian tube to prevent my hydrosalpinx…what? He said it could be just farther up my tube or it could just be “floating” around?? So I need to get another HSG…oh joy…because having dye pushed through, already diagnosed, blocked tubes is so much fun πŸ™ I guess they need to see if it’s there and doing it’s job of blocking the hydrosalpinx…yay(insert sarcasm smilie)..

And then we will wait. And wait some more…..

I’m getting used to waiting. Getting put under. Getting cut. Getting stabbed . Getting cramps. Getting headaches. Getting nauseas. Getting broke. Getting used to it all.

Accepting it, I won’t. I won’t accept anything but a baby at the end of this infertility marathon. I really didn’t think I was strong enough for 1/2 of the things I’ve already gone through….not even a 1/4….but I have and I will. I’ve got my eye on a prize and nothing will get in my way. I’m not sad for myself. I’m thankful for all of these opportunities that will ultimately heal me.It must be God’s way of telling me, I’m on the right path.

Thankful for all of these doctors working on me. Thankful for the strength it has given me. Thankful for my renewed appreciation of life. Thankful for my future.

Every day I get closer to my dream…I know I will be a mother one day….I won’t lose focus

How long will I wait for my baby? I’m not going anywhere…..ever