Month: August 2014

Cancelled….again…

And that’s that…FET#4…cancelled….

My lining actually shrunk and was worse than the ultrasound this past Tues…today, it was about 4mm again…

Welcome to my horrible, pain in the a**(literally because of those darn Estradiol Valerate shots), stubborn lining 🙁

So I just took some progesterone and should be expecting my period in the next two weeks…oh joy, more waiting…

I’m still not giving up.

Month after month my lining doesn’t seem to want to cooperate. My RE looks at me like, “I told you, you need a Gestational Carrier.” And I tell him….ok…this is what we are trying next….(and I can see him thinking..”Well, that probably won’t work either hun”…..too bad, we are trying EVERYTHING!

I’m just not giving up.

I’m not allowing these defeats to take over my soul. I cry….yes I do…I wish I knew what I could do for this lining to plump up…I’m doing everything I can…and will keep doing it.

I’m not broken…and I won’t allow myself to feel broken.

Next month we are trying Tamoxifen. It helped increase the lining in some patients that were unresponsive to estrogen. Like me. I guess we will just have to try it and see….

That’s all we can do right? All of us have issues. Some have the same infertility issues and some of us have different issues and all we can do is keep trying.

If we give up, we will lose 100% of the time…but if there’s a chance….as small is it may be…we’ve got to try…

I hope that I can one day look back on this post and thank myself for not giving up or giving in….it will be worth it in the end….I can just feel it…

tumblr_mkn2l3Pf061s7up46o1_1280

 

Another Lining Update FET #4

AdobePresenterUpdate

Quick update….it’s CD 29 and I’m still trying to grow this lining for FET #4….almost a full month on Estradiol Valerate shots and suppositories.

Last Fri, it was around 5mm…today it’s around 5.7mm(he drained the fluid that was STILL in there to get this measurement). It’s weird though because my RE showed me how if he moves the wand one way it’s 4mm and if he moves the wand another way it’s 7mm….say what?! So I guess he took from a mid point?? He is giving me until this Fri to see where it is and then decide what we should do next. He still says it doesn’t look pretty and any other patient he would just cancel this cycle and start over…so….way to make a girl feel special….kind of…in a bad way? Faaaantastic….que sarcasm….

Anyways, that’s all for now. I’m just gonna keep doing what I’m doing and see what happens…5.7…I’ll take it(and 2.3mm more please ;))