cant-lose-weight-I-can-do-it

Seems unbelievable right? To be included in SUCH a small percentage of what “could” (or could not) happen?

“Approximately 0.6%–0.8% of patients cannot reach the minimum endometrial thickness for pregnancy”

0.6%-0.8%….seriously?

I went in today for a “natural” cycle lining check….let’s be REAL nothing is “natural” anymore. I’m literally a human test dummy…and the verdict….2.8mm…..:( As most of you know…it should be more like 8.0mm+ I am dumbfounded and so are my RE’s…..

I had my 2nd hysteroscopy on April 10. I went to THE premiere Asherman’s Syndrome Dr….he did the hysteroscopy and said…he only saw some “filmy adhesions”…not that bad and a “small” bald spot in the upper area of my uterus. He didn’t seem too concerned. He put me on Pentoxifylline(Trental) and Vitamin E(I actually started it at the end of March when I first saw him)…and we wait a couple of months….

I know it’s only been a little over a month….but most people have their thickest linings right AFTER a hysteroscopy….and mine is basically non existent…

Now…I also….re-read my last paragraph…and I did write “most people”….obviously, i am NOT most people….I am, unfortunately, part of the 0.6%-0.8% of women who cannot seem to reach the minimum endometrial thickness for implantation…..wow….those odds…..not even 1%

This all just happened about an hour ago. I was optimistic….feeling great…feeling like…”my lining should be nice and plump” The surgery had to work!

Then the ultrasound…and nada….I still have a super thin lining AND fluid in my lining πŸ™ What’s the deal?

0.6%-0.8%….it just gets me…..gets to my soul…..why me? How is it possible to be a part of this percentage?

What gets me most is how easy the Dr.’s are to start talking about gestational carriers. Like it’s like…ordering a pizza…what?? Sure, because everyone just has $100,000 laying around….

But, I am EXTREMELY fortunate and after my 2nd IVF, I have 6 blastocysts…very fortunate and blessed…but I’ve never even had an embryo near my uterus….ever. I’ve never been pregnant….never had a miscarriage…never a D&C until last Aug. I only have one tube…that’s blocked and now…that’s REALLY blocked because I had the Essure device placed to prevent a possible Ectopic pregnancy or fluid pouring back in killing an embryo.

I’m still determined to, at least, have one embryo placed in my uterus before looking into a gestational carrier(if that’s even financially possible??)…can’t even think about that now…even though tears still seem to force their way out of my eyes…like I have no control over them…I am strong…but gosh…I am less than 1% πŸ™

I’m researching like it’s my job…and it WILL be my job…because I have no choice…

I’m looking at all of the options…there HAS to be an option for us 0.6%-0.8%….and I’ll find it..

I’m going to try another lining stimulation cycle next month…with estrogen injectables…with 2 IVF’s down…injectables are nothing to me…so let’s do it…we might also try something called G-CSFΒ It’s new and the results are mixed but I’m literally willing to try anything….

I’ve also looked into stem cells….

In 2009…a women in India had impossible problems with her lining and using her own bone marrow stem cells…they implanted them into her uterus and she was able to grow an adequate endometrium….I really hope I don’t have to go that route (God are you listening πŸ˜‰ but don’t put it past me…

I’m on a mission….I have tears streaming down my face…but they are fighting tears….I wipe them away as I search and search for what is right for me….and what is right for me is not giving up and finding everything and anything i can about growing my lining…

0.6%-0.8%…..I have 99.4% against me…..but there’s still a chance….and as long as there’s a chance…I haven’t lost…..

And I don’t like losing…..